I’m so hungry right now..this happens so often these days, not intentionally, just for the simple fact I have no idea what to eat. I had 3 veggie tacos for lunch today. Now I’m not sure what to get for dinner..but I’m so hungry and weak I barely have energy to go out for something. 

I have realized something yesterday. I guess I always knew this but the only way to be happy is to be responsible for your own happiness and not rely on anyone else. Luckily, I did not come to this realization because of anyone close to me but it did make me realize that close people can turn out the same someday. Most of them most likely will, and you will be left wondering what happened..as you never would’ve thought it would turn out that way. Mutual feelings with people are hard to find. I have learned from experience. Unfortunately this creates major trust issues for me. Maybe someday I will find it. 

Now off in search of more food..

Part 2

I don’t know how much of an audience I get on this blog..I’m going to pretend nobody reads this so I’ll post more freely. Well apparently I have 56 followers. Anyways!

I am stressed because I don’t know what I will do with my life. I am close to being able to earn a full-time income while I work from home..which makes me closer to my dream of being able to live wherever I want, every few months. BUT that will also mean I have to leave everyone behind. I am fine with that as I have always been pretty independent and my solo trip around Europe a couple years ago was amazing…yet there is someone I never want to leave and I know I won’t be able to have that life if I choose this one. So that is my dilemma. I know family/friends will always still be there but unfortunately relationships can’t continue that way. I guess that’s why a lot of fashion bloggers have a photographer boyfriend who goes around with them! 

20-ish more minutes until I get picked up..I’ll try to de-stress with my new favourite song on repeat. Jason Derulo feat. 2 Chainz - Talk Dirty (MANDEE Bootleg) —- very random I know! 

Hi. 

Kind of a continuation from the blog post I posted earlier today. Currently sitting at Bridgehead, ridiculously bored..Fridays are usually slow days at work which is a good and bad thing I guess. Bad when I’m here “working” at coffee shops all day while I wait for my bf to finish work and pick me up again. About 40 more minutes to kill today…ahhh. 

I gave up on trying to use this slow WIFI here so I’m tethering the data from my phone. It’s my first time doing this. Hopefully it won’t get used up. 

Not sure what else to talk about.

My stocks are not doing that well today..which I guess happens most Fridays. I realized a lot of the stocks I chose to watch because they had cool names are doing well..I should’ve went with my gut feeling in the beginning and just purchased them, because now I’m stuck with the ones I thought were “safer” and they’re not doing as well. 

I’m supposed to return to Toronto on Monday. I dread being back and having to catch up on everything. After a long time away there’s always that transition period which I’m not looking forward to. Yet I’m not sure I can stay here much longer (as I didn’t bring enough stuff to last me this long, and I miss my dog, and I’m nervous my mailbox will be overstuffed. Have an inevitable stack of business/travel magazines I need to catch up on!) 

Also, having a long distance relationship is really hard. So I’ve been really stressed and emotional these days and I’m not sure what will happen in the next few months..

Its been awhile..going to start updating this again, sporadically. 

- need to wake up tomorrow to go to my dentist appointment..apparently I have a cavity that needs filling. I’m quite nervous as I’ve never had a filling before so I need to mentally prepare myself now for the pain. I have a very low tolerance for pain. 

- I’ve tried just about every brand of white nail polish but it’s so difficult to find a good one. I just got OPI’s Alpine Snow earlier today and am painting my nails now..it still needs several coats because it never comes out even. 

- Still into stock trading these days. I wish I didn’t get so emotionally attached to the stocks I purchase, since I can’t bring myself to sell any even when the prices go up/I can actually make money. But hopefully holding on to them for the long term will make me even more money. I used to have a Blackberry. Ended up hating it and switched over to Samsung/Android. Now I like Blackberry again as I made a bit over $100 so far from its recent stock price increase. 

- I wish I could go back to last night at this time when I was with my BF. Somehow I always end up in long distance relationships (this one started local). By now you’d think I would be used to it already. Hopefully it won’t be for too long though. 

- I need more time in a day. Or I guess less interests. I realized one of my biggest problems is that I can never concentrate on one thing..well, I try to concentrate on too many things at once which isn’t good, as nothing will get my full attention. Similar to how my blog doesn’t have a main focus. I realized this tonight when I was looking for different blogs to read. 

I’m completely addicted to stocks now. I check the markets throughout the day..bought a share of Google today since that’s all I could afford. Let’s hope the price keeps going up. But not before I purchase more. I feel better investing in stocks than in a new handbag now. I guess once I get better at this I’ll reward myself with a new handbag. 

Or I can invest a bit in LVMH instead. 

#goog  

Random Thoughts - Feb 18 2014

I’m going to start updating this blog again. I feel like I always do this in spurts..but now I’ll start writing private thoughts on here again as I feel it’s more private once again (since the link is taken off my main blog). Not sure if anyone bookmarked the page lol. 

Right now I’m listening to Green Day’s “Time Of Your Life” . You know how when you listen to some songs..it brings you back to one moment in the past that you’ll think of whenever you hear the song? Well when I hear this song, I now think of that time in London last year when I was in the tube station going up the escalators. There was a small band at the bottom playing this song. I usually walk while on escalators, but that time I decided to just stand there and listen to the song playing. Random people going up and down the escalators started singing it too. Now when I listen to it I’m brought back to that moment and start to miss London…

So I finally started on stock trading. I’ve been meaning to do it for a long time already, but never got around to it. I’m glad I did because it really helps me save (plus it’s a lot of fun). When I think of buying something now or going out for a meal, I think of how I’d rather use that money to buy x or y stock. & any extra money I have, I put it right into my bank account so I can buy more stocks. I’m pretty familiar now with which stocks are in which price ranges..which stock I can buy in exchange for a dinner out..etc. $45 used to mean a nice dinner but now it is the price of 1 share of Sotheby’s stock (my first investment). Let’s see in a few months if that is still the cost of it.

Daily/nightly Storage Wars marathons in bed, with my laptop, stuffing myself with Nerds (candy) = life these days

recent life

www.instagram.com/leftbanked for more

www.instagram.com/leftbanked for more

Sugar high at Laduree in Covent Garden.

Sugar high at Laduree in Covent Garden.

#laduree  

In London at the moment. Everything is going well. Will give a proper update next time! Sorry for neglecting this blog (if any of you read it).. Follow my Instagram and main blog for more updates.

"Lebenslanger Schicksalsschatz" is not something that develops over time. It is something that happens instantaneously. It courses through you like the water of a river after a storm, filling you and emptying you all at once. You feel it throughout your body, in your hands, in your heart, in your stomach, in your skin… have you ever felt this way about someone? If you have to think about it, you have not felt it.

"In exactly 45 days from now you and I are going to meet and we’re going to fall in love and we’re going to get married and we’re going to have 2 kids and we’re going to love them and each other so much. All that is 45 days away, but I’m here now I guess because… I want those extra 45 days with you. I want each one of them. Look and if I can’t have them I’ll take the 45 seconds before your boyfriend shows up and punches me in the face, because… I love you. I’m always gonna love you, til the end of my days and beyond. You’ll see."

#himym  
In lust with these.

In lust with these.

Had a dream about Chi-Town last night. 

Chi-Town = Patrick J Adams doppelganger, who I knew 2 years ago & kind of miss whenever I watch Suits.